Guilt and the Need for Forgiveness

"First, if you are simply remorseful that an innocent man has been killed, that is not enough.  You need to change your mind about Him, and embrace Him as the Christ.  And if you are believing on Him, and you desire to wash his blood from your hands you must publicly renounce this wicked action, or your association with the nation that has done this, and publicly confess this change of mind through water baptism."

Many of us, when we have wronged someone stand openhanded, almost with a sense of helplessness about how we can make it right.  And this remains true even for Christians, and rightly it should.  A legal standing of "not guilty" before the court, (or before the throne of God) will not clear man's conscience.  And oftentimes, "coming clean" about an issue is as much for the perpetrator of a crime as it is the victim of a crime.  When I was in high school, I had a friend named Linda.  In all my dealings with her she was a good and decent person.  She was also obese.  One day before class, I found myself loudly articulating to anyone within earshot that obese people lack self-discipline, how there's no excuse for their condition, etc. etc.  It was a statement rooted in biological ignorance about the complex causes for obesity.  And more importantly, when I examine my conscience, I am persuaded my comment was simply a veiled way to boast about my own thin frame, as if my body type were somehow the product, or reflection, of my inner character.  Worst of all however,  as I was speaking, I turned around to discover that Linda had walked into class and taken a seat behind me, and judging from the  organization of the books and papers in front of her, she had been there for at least a minute while I was.  I averted my eyes from hers in shame.  I didn't know how to make it right.  In our culture is generally impolite to tell someone they are obese.  And yet to apologize to her for my comment, I would, at least tangentially, have to point to her obesity.  Even if I were to apologize, it was likely to cause more hurt.  I could search for some way of making it right, or I could let the matter fester.  I chose the latter.  Many years later, I have reflected on that moment, and wished I could take it back.